Wellness
by ECaP founder, Bernie Siegel, MD

First, I think it is important to define wellness. Since I don't consider myself a normal doctor to begin with, let me say that for me wellness is not related to the state of one's body, but to state of one's mind. There are many people with afflictions that can never be cured whom I consider to be quite well and healed. By healed, I mean they may not have normal bodies but they are at peace with themselves, others and their lives. Animals sense and live this way more easily than people. They may be missing parts, but they still are capable of loving and teaching those around them about life and love. They remain whole in the true sense of the word. They are in harmony with their Creator, not whining, making excuses, blaming others or feeling that their disease or affliction is related to guilt, blame or shame.
Wellness transcends the physical and incorporates the spiritual and philosophical dimensions of life. It is not based upon curing disease and does not see death as a failure. Therefore, physicians or members of the clergy do not fail or lose when someone is not saved by their prayers or therapy. Just as I don't think God wants me to walk home if I lose my car keys, I don't think God wants me to be sick if I lose my health. I look for my car keys and I look for ways to restore my health.
As caregivers, if we begin to see disease and death as failures, then we subject ourselves to an unhealthy position that does not allow us to truly get close to and care for people. I find that many physicians and clergy suffer Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. If we do not get an opportunity to discuss how we feel about what we are experiencing, the pain is buried within us where it takes its toll and can lead to depression, illness and unhappiness with our chosen work. You must bring forth what is within, or it will destroy you.
To help ourselves, we must become aware of our feelings. One way to achieve this is through journaling or attending group meetings. Feelings must be dealt with and not imprisoned within where they can literally break your heart. We need to look at the deeper, significant reasons why we have chosen our profession so that we can practice in a healthy way. We must remember the message is "your sins are forgiven," not "rise and walk." Healing can lead to physical wellness and curing of afflictions, but it is a by-product of the healing.
I am an outside advisor to the Board of Directors of Heaven and I see that vegetarians, people who meditate, joggers and the faithful all die. Some of them are quite bitter when they realize how much time and effort they put into trying to avoid death. The message is to live fully your unique and authentic life and then you will live your longest, fullest life. Remember, he who seeks to save his life will lose it, but he who is willing to lose his life will save it. I see many people recover from life threatening illnesses when they learn they have a short time left to live. It is at that moment of reckoning that they begin to live their true life - what is in their hearts. Then, they feel so good they don't die.
What do you have to offer those you can't cure? What sermon do you give a quadriplegic man lying in the Emergency Room? Think about it for a moment. What would you say to give him the will to live? How could you inspire him so that he won't want to expire? Your words will not make a difference, no matter how great the sermon. Why? Because you can walk and do not know what he is experiencing. You are a tourist and not a native.
What I have learned is to bring the natives together in groups and let them share their experiences and guide and support each other. They have lived it and can help in a way that tourists can't. I have also learned not to treat the diagnosis, but rather the experience. When someone has an affliction, I ask them to share in their own words what they are experiencing. Their words tell me what needs healing. Words like failure, draining, weight refer to things that make them feel like a failure or are draining their energy. There are also those who see their affliction as a gift, a wake up call, or a new beginning. When they accept their mortality, they are awakened to the fact that they are only here for a limited time and they start using the time in ways that feel right.
God enticed Adam and Eve into eating from the tree of knowledge so they would be aware of their nakedness and mortality. We can cover our nakedness easily, but it is harder to deny our mortality. We become healthier when we accept our mortality and begin to live our lives, expressing love in our unique way and indignation when we are not respected. We learn to play, express our needs and feelings, make our decisions, say no to things we do not want to do, use our pain to redirect us and know that we are not defined by the role we play. We are children of God and precious in His sight.
I feel that God created a world where difficulties exist so that we could be co-creators and continue the process. Just as the universe was created from nothing by the One, we represent the potential that exists in undifferentiated nothing. Like a blank canvas, we are to become works of art. We are here to show compassion and love and to create a Garden of Eden by our choice so that it has meaning and significance.
For me, the mysticism exists in numbers. They are quantity and meaning, discovered and invented. We use them to store meaning and symbolize the elements and relationships of life. From the nothing comes the one. The zero and the one are the key. They come together in the 10 commandments, 10 fingers and toes, the basis for the computer system, perfect test scores, myths and more. When we take another's hand we create the one and the zero. So continue what has come out of the nothing and help the One to continue to create.
When you are truly creating, you lose track of time and become ageless and free of all afflictions. When you stop working and start creating, you are experiencing wellness in the way our Creator intended us to live and feel.